Weight Loss

I guess I'll make my weight loss thing a little more public.

Basically since I graduated high school in 1994 my weight has been a rollercoaster. Largely due to health issues. I gained weight after high school, then lost a good portion when I started working a physical job. Then I got sick, and couldn't eat. Lost more weight.

Then I got better, put some weight on, got sick... and put on a LOT of weight. This lasted for years. I tried losing weight, but it was really rough. I peaked at 285lbs, but had trouble losing it as I had no energy. As it turns out, I had something else wrong with me, besides my initial problems: extremely slow thyroid. the normal range for someone is 0.4 - 5.0. the higher the number, the slower it is. Mine was 207.8.

I had initially gone to the doctor because of depression and panic attacks (both caused by my thyroid, but it not working wasn't yet known.) So, I got put on zoloft, but my (extremely awesome) doctor also had me get bloodwork for my thyroid. That's when I found it it was messed up. So, started taking medication for that.

Next thing I knew, I was down to about 235lbs. Then I got off the zoloft, since I didn't need it. Getting off the zoloft increased my appetite. So, I put a bunch of weight back on. Ugly cycle.

I'm now in the process of eating better, and exercising regularly. I'm setting different goals for weight. I had gotten up to 274. So, my first goal is to lose about 2lbs a week until I get down to 250 (about 7 pounds to go.) After I get there, I'm changing my calorie counter to 1.5lbs a week. I then want to get down to 225. Then, I will slow down yet again. 1 lb a week until I'm down to 185-190. At that point I'd be skinny (for me, I'm just naturally a big guy.)

We'll see how it goes. If I get down to at least 220 I'll be much healthier.

Whitney

Her music wasn't my thing. I know she was a legend for the style though.

I've got such a mixed take about her passing. I don't look at her fans being sad as some sort of bad thing. I see way too many people posting pictures on facebook, or making remarks about how other people died and no one is talking about them.

Here's the problem with that argument: they don't KNOW those people. Celebrities reach us. I know I myself was sad when Layne Staley was found dead, and when Dimebag Darrel was murdered. These people reached me with their music, and I wouldn't even want to cheapen an artist's death to their fans. Whitney wasn't my thing, but I will respect the mourning of her fans.

On my other side, her death makes me angry, just like Layne's did. These celebrities have everything. So they throw it all away with drugs. I've watched people I love destroy themselves with drugs. I'm not talking smoking a little marijuana. I'm talking about the ones on coke, heroin, crack, meth, the pill poppers... its horrible to see someone you love destroy themselves for a "high." Watching their health deteriorate, them go through insane mood swings due to their addictions. It hurts. So whenever I see it come to death by a celebrity, it makes me think of those who I've watched fall apart and force me away from their use.

Every time one of them passes, I hope that someone begins to come to their senses, and quits using. Life is too short to waste in a daze.

Bury the Past

In life, we all make errors. The important thing you often hear is to learn from them, so you don't do them again. This contradicts the key to advancing yourself: leaving them in the past. If we forever dwell on this stain on our history, we can never move on to better things.

This is the most difficult part: managing to learn and forget the same occurance.

The Pope and Condoms

I read recently that Pope Palpatine er... Pope Benedict has said its ok for condoms to be used in some cases. That case being: if you are a male prostitute... to prevent the spread of aids.

This I simply don't get.

I'd look at prostitution as being a bigger sin than wearing a rubber. With that in mind, I can't picture someone not worried about the prostitution sin, but all freaked out about wearing a jimmy hat.

If your gonna say one group can put a sock on the pickle, and another can't I declare it an official act of bullshittery. Just say its ok to use a condom, but keep sex within marriage. Don't pull this if mess. It just doesn't make sense.

Now I'm off to prostitute myself so my condom usage is OK...

A New Beginning

Many years ago I started blogging to learn a little HTML, and to improve my writing skills.  That mission has long been accomplished.

Later, my blogging took a political, yet comedic twist.  Eventually I got bored with that.

I’ve tried several times to clear my brain, and re-invent my writing outlet.  Most of that has been wiped from the face of the net.  My writing was just…  sub standard to what I wanted.

So last July I called it quits on this blog.

Today I’ve returned.  I’m in hopes I have found a new desire to write.  I have all my pre-requisites to be an active writer:  educated, unemployed, and probably clinically depressed.

With that said, I deleted all the entries on this blog.  I reset my 972 hits to 0.  I’ve now written my mission statement:  to write.  That’s it.  That’s all.  Just to write.